They’re addicted to survival mode.
Their whole system is built on one fear:
“If I’m not the one who matters right now, I’ll disappear.”
So they control, defend, argue, interrupt, dominate, not out of ego, but out of terror.
Here are truths a narcissist must understand to transform:
1. Control doesn’t create safety, responsibility does.
You don’t become safe when you win.
You become safe when you can say,
“I caused harm, and I’m here to repair.”
2. Vulnerability isn’t humiliation, it’s connection.
People don’t trust ‘strength’ that can’t pause, listen, and let another perspective exist.
They trust the courage to be human.
3. Other people aren’t threats.
Two people can matter at the same time.
This is the shift from survival mode → relationship mode.
4. Strength isn’t for domination, it’s for protection.
Healthy Fight energy doesn’t silence others.
It protects the space so everyone feels safe.
When a narcissist learns this, their Fight energy becomes helpful:
leadership without intimidation, clarity without cruelty, power without fear, responsibility that creates connection.
This is how a narcissist becomes someone people can finally feel connect with.
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