Are You Being Kind or Silently Worshipping Their Ego? Sounds crazy, right?
Why is people-pleasing like idol worship?
But here’s why: Think about an idol.
1. It just sits there, letting people do whatever they want.
2. It never says “no,” never pushes back.
3. It exists only to make the worshipper feel good.
Now, picture a people-pleaser (sometimes myself).
1. Always saying “yes,” scared of upsetting others.
2. Never standing up for what they actually think or feel.
3. Acting just like that idol—quietly validating someone else’s demands.
Who is the worshipper in this picture?
But wait—what about the worshipper?
1. They’re not “nice.” They’re actually self-centered.
2. They expect the idol to give them whatever they want.
3. They’re stuck in a fight response—aggressively demanding validation.
Here’s the BIG problem:
People-pleasing isn’t kindness. It’s training people to disrespect your boundaries.
How can you stop people-pleasing and set boundaries?
Here’s what to do instead:
Set tiny, clear boundaries. Practice saying, “I can’t do that right now, but here’s what I CAN do.”
Expect discomfort at first. Realize discomfort is a sign of growth—not danger. Focus on genuine connection, not approval. True relationships improve when honesty replaces constant pleasing. Think about:
When you stop being an idol, you start being yourself.
Being Nice Isn’t Always Nice—Sometimes It’s Idol Worship.
“Real kindness means honesty, not just agreement.”
Explore the NextSelf Blog. Start with this post explaining the world of souls, and what does it mean to be light? And my Youtube. Content is published to this facebook first and a few days later, to the blog.
The blog lists all the difference patterns to study, understanding patterns is how one can develop 'Daas' [felt knowing].
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